Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Ok, here is a real update...less emotions in this one:-)

Ok, now that my emotional outbursts have come to a halt, for now...I am here to give a real update on my crazy, stressful life...

School? It is going awesome. You know when you stick your neck out and try something you've dreamt about, and the you succeed...find your passion, and wonder why you haven't done it sooner? Yeah, that is how I feel. I am so glad for the turn of events that my life took 2 years ago, and for the growth that has occurred in me, and that I was and still am open to growing. If I hadn't been there, I would never be close to where I am now. I am thrilled and excited!!

Weight Loss? Yeah, that is less then a success. I am struggling with the times that I have available to eat now. I find that when I am done school in the evenings I am ready for a feast, most nights. I need to figure it out a bit better...I have been wavering between a 1 and 2 pound gain and loss for months now. Eventually I know I will move from this plateau...

Family life? I am so thankful for my family. I love that they are doing the best they can to support me while I am in school. Cleaning and being ready the night before, so I am not stressing out in the morning. I am enjoying the time I have with them more and more. This past weekend I took the girls out to a movie. We watched Where the Wild Things Are. We all loved it, even the 4 year old. I got it and think that any parent who has a child with a wild imagination and also a hard time controlling their emotions, this is a great movie to take them to. It opened up a lot of dialogue for us and we still are talking about our "wild things". I watched my son play football with his school yesterday afternoon. It was great to see him out there trying with so much heart. He seemed so small though, not just him, but the whole team. The other team were seriously giants!! They lost, but I loved supporting him and watching the game.

Faith? I am at a point now where I am seeing what I think are some effects of her brain injury. I am going to continue explaining it off right now as "She is 2, and 2 year olds pull hair" know, that kind of thing, but I am not ready to say that the behaviours are typical for this age. Kids at 2, when they pull hair, they look for the reaction. Faith gets quite the reaction, but has no emotional response on her face. It is blank and is also just a little thing and we are waiting to see where it goes from here. Her fine motor is equal to a 10 month old, she doesn't have the pinch grasp (issues with buttons, zippers, laces etc...) her communication is at 18 months, her problem solving is quite delayed...she can put a block on top of another block, but only one, then her mind loses the concept and she plays with them another way, her sorting and recognition abilities are also lacking...things that we are going to be working on.

We have an assessment that we are scheduling for May 2010, it is a psychological assessment done through our Infant and Child Development Program. It will determine where she is at and will help us set goals for her, so she can be productive and excel in her life. We have talked with them about preschool in September (I know a long way away) because she does have a significant developmental delay, we are looking into ou different options. We are also going to apply for the funding now so that we can send her to whatever helps she will need.

With all of this going on, I am not devastated. I still have my miracle, and now the "professionals" are agreeing that there are some issues that need to be looked into a little further. I feel like I wasn't confused. I know my child and that little voice that keeps saying there is something not right, is validated. I am ok with it all because she is going to get all the early intervention she needs while her brain rebuilds itself. I am also glad that this came from a professional so that when I tell people she is delayed and they respond with "every child is different" "who determines 'normal'"? and all those wonderfully encouraging phrases I can reply with our worker has been doing testings and these are the more arguments...

On another note, before we speak about others situations we really need to think about the responses that can come. So I have been told "every child is different" and I know that and agree, however I know my child. When that is said it is negating everything that I feel as a mother. It makes me question whether my feelings and instincts are right. It makes me wonder if I am making this up. It makes me question whether I am just looking for attention.

4 little words...but that is another post...

Altogether life is well:-)


  1. Wow, you've got a lot going on! Glad you are well, my friend.